I haven’t quite finished my photo essay of Roswell, but it’s coming along. In order to pass the time until I get the pictures developed, I’ve decided to make an “as promised” entry. It turns out, I’m Tina Belcher.
So…all the silly human beings of my generation have favorite shows on television. I am no exception to this reality. My favorite television show is Bob’s Burgers. It is not my only favorite show. I have a good healthy set of favorite shows, but the one I know particularly well is the cartoon show on Fox about a family that runs a burger restaurant. It’s not just because I love burgers and because my favorite restaurant in Roswell is Big D’s which is the local version of the same experience. It’s because it is hilarious and I’m basically the grown-up version of the first daughter Tina.
In truth I wish I were the grown-up version of the youngest child, evil genius Louise. I adore Louise. She gets things done. She is the kind of person who will be a millionaire by the time she is my age. Tina will not be a millionaire, because Tina has this super honest and loving nature. She always wants to do the right thing, the wise thing. If she were in Hogwart’s, she would be Hufflepuff. She is bad at running. She is boy crazy. The only thing we don’t have in common is she is fascinated with zombies. I have never had much interest in zombies, but I certainly had (and still have) a great deal of interest in the opposite sex. I even had the goofy outfit and haircut and the barrette.
There is one other thing that Tina and I don’t have in common. Tina had to take remedial math.
I think we humans like to pick favorite shows and align ourselves with the characters because it fulfills some need for fantasy we all have. Our dreams shape our day-to-day. Louise has a crush on a boy named Boo-Boo, but she doesn’t understand her attraction so she refers to him as a disgusting beautiful garbage angel. Gene (the boy of the kids) wants to be a musician and composer, but he says scales and practice are gross. Tina wants to ride horses, but horses in reality aren’t anything like her imaginary horse Jericho. Bob is a burger artist, but he can’t make the leap to genuine success, and Linda wants to be a crazy sex freak, but she’s a wife and mom who really has more talent as a wife and mom than a crazy sex freak. Their failures are just so funny and beautiful. They teach me to laugh at myself by letting me laugh at them.
I will not suggest seeing the show to my readers. It’s my show. Hands off. Watch something else. 30 Rock is good, as is Parks and Recreation. For serious folks there’s The Wire. Deadliest Catch has a wonderful energy. This Old House never fails to entertain. The Great British Baking Show makes me happy. For political satire, it begins and ends with Last Week Tonight with John Oliver. If you can’t resist Bob’s Burgers try and start from the beginning, that way you’ll have a chance to fall for the Tina-risma.